The Editor is holding a contest, open to anyone who is foolish enough to waste their time on this zombie-filled rag. To wit: a close friend of the Editor (we all know this one, don't we, as in, "a good friend of mine has an embarassing rash . . .") is rather short on cash, and is strongly considering prostituting his or her (the pen name will tell you nothing) writing talent (such as it is - but don't say I said so) to make some money. This friend is, in short, writing a romance novel. Said bodice-ripper is already under way, but some of the characters still exist without a name. So. If you can sucessfully name 1) the heroine's bitchy sister in law; 2) the hero (who has a working name already, which could use some improvement); or 3) the hero's bitchy ex-girlfriend, you could win any one of thousands of fabulous prizes! We are not going to say exactly what those prizes are, as there are too many (and they're too good! really!) to go into at this time. But they're really, really awesome.
First and last names please. This is set in modern England, as the hack house for which the Editor's friend is writing has very specific guidelines. And all of the above characters are rich and glamorous, and make the heroine feel inferior, until she realizes that spunk is worth more than sophistication any day of the week. Retch. Anyway. Any help would be appreciated, as there is only so much combing of baby name websites that one person can stand. Or so I hear.
In other news: the Teva-Uggs are now being proudly displayed by my favorite trash website, go fug yourself. (No, I didn't mean that personally, it's the name of the site, dammit.) View them here. And Cologne, our favorite blogger whackjob, has not deigned to respond to our comment on his/her/its page. But he/she/it (I'm leaning towards it - anyone with me?) has managed to post 12 entries since I left my comment, on Thursday. Read them if you dare.
But I'm done for tonight. I've been inspired by my friend's noble efforts to make quick money by selling his/her talents into bondage to the forces of Darkness. I'm going to go start my very own zombie romance novel, and believe me, it'll be a doozy. Just picture Fabio's rotting flesh, clad only in a shirt which is open to the waist, and leather trousers, and you'll get the idea.
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2 comments:
Digby Milwright
Congratulations to both Tifanie and Ideasculptor! Parts of all of their entries are being put in the official "Book of Crappy Romance Names", and finalized names with prizes will be announced soon! Tifanie and Ideasculptor, your names will be forever immortalized in the annals of cheap drugstore literature.
Kudos to you.
I can't belieeeeve it's not buttaaaah . . . aaaah . . . aaargh, must have . . . huuuuman flesssssshhhhhh . . . (slurp, crunch, aaaaaaah)
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