Suxx0rz III: Return of Lerx, Son of Haxx0rz

My research team and I were sitting around the (newly transplanted to Cuba) zombie lab this evening, sipping Scotch and discussing important science things, and we were struck by the resemblance of this new internet dialect, which includes such words (possibly acronyms?) as "liaox", "lor", and "herx", to the ineffably lame, earlier internet dialect referenced in the title of this post. We're wondering if perhaps the (no doubt) brilliant computer geniuses who thought that "suxx0rz" was a witty way to lambast their opponents have now grown older, and spawned a generation of lerx enthusiasts. The generation gap would be about right, the mentality is certainly on par; it gave us food for thought. Our staff pycologist already checked all known sources of internet acronyms without luck, and is rubbing his head in continuing puzzlement, as are we all. Any information is, as always, appreciated, and we will provide more updates as we damn well please.

And now for something completely different, yet equally baffling. Our linguist at first thought that this entire blog was written in Esperanto, or perhaps Zbglorbian, but we have now decided that it belongs to the Indo-Moronic language group. Here's an excerpt from a post titled "Casual Friday Cologne", for your reading lack of pleasure (at least, we assume you wouldn't enjoy it, if you could understand it at all):

Necktie morning simple panties panties lolita lempicka paloma picasso dressed modestly casual friday cologne, hanae mori perfums fashionable necktie kolner perfume getting ready tie a tie neckties. Aftershave then use aqua di gio michael kors pantymen diapers girdles tie a bow tie casual friday cologne, dusseldorf well dressed girdles jo malone crossdressers hour glass figure aftershave bijan bvlgari. Crossdressing men began colognes how to tie a tie keulen joop for men dress casual friday cologne, floris crossdressing interzum fracas keln michael kors transvestites necktie gingham.

Dear author: when the world needs a schizophrenic, metrosexual genetic cross between James Joyce and Vladimir Nabokov, we will let you know. What exactly is this? A stream of consciousness informing one of which colognes to wear at which times of day? How incredibly . . . unique. The Editor is now deeply lamenting the choice I made, when setting up this blog. Having wavered, for longer than I will even admit, between garbled, disturbingly semi-pornographic perfume advice as my theme, or the admittedly less adventurous general commentary route, I eventually chose the latter, to my lasting shame. But at least this need is being served! And most efficiently! Cologne, the name of our prolific poster, has written a total of 244 posts, coming to 47,409 words, since November, and ALL IN THE SAME STYLE. Yes, if you printed the entire oeuvre, in a 12-point font and double-spaced, you would have approximately 190 pages, quite a magnum opus to be sure. And at an average of 24 posts per week, anyone who has this peculiar need is having it filled more than three times a day! Well, we are humbled in the face of Cologne's industry. What more can we say.

This is a side note, but I would like everyone to remember that they saw it here first. Apparently, The Onion, which truly is America's Finest News Source, has also picked up on the looming threat of the avian flu. See? This page is totally au courant.

And, to all of my fans out there, I have this to say to you: Others plan others next did wandering badges yovo bastards, badges jealousy crazy bitch revlon prove it crap shut up.